"I could never do that."
"I wish I am talented like that."
"I wish I could be like that."
"I hate that I _______."
The list goes on and on if you let it.
We are so critical in our being sometimes that it is amazing that we even have time to find someone to criticize us. We live in a world now more than ever with social media so it's natural for us to find ourselves comparing than simply admiring. I don't care how good you have it, there is someone out there showing off all you wish you could do and be. And that is okay. We are humans so it is a natural thing to have those moments, but it is not okay to dwell on it to the point that is all you do to the point you are hurting yourself rather than embracing your uniqueness. We are all different, so no one is the same, so we all lack somewhere, but in the fictitious world created in the media world somehow is easy to find ways to forget the qualities we do have.
We all just focus too much on what we are not good at or what we lack, we will insanely forget the beauty we possess and what makes us different. Let's remember, your talents are so innate to you naturally it can be difficult for you to even identify them at times. What comes so easy for you, maybe a huge struggle for someone else. That mindset somehow convinces us is just another thing, is easily brushed off and we forget to appreciate it, until someone else may start to ask you for help in that area. Another reason is that you may not even try to improve your talents and understand that it can grow to something extraordinary unless you use that ability if and when you discover your passion. And let's not forget that many people may make things so easy and confuse you with the struggles, practices, and many failures you must encounter that are NOT shown.
People remembered and watched the Beyonce Coachella 1.45 minutes performance but fail to understand it took over 8 months to create, practice, and countless bloopers to get that right. And please do not forget all the prior experiences she had that helped her to make her visual into reality.
This inner critic can be loud, very loud, and if you are a Virgo like me. Forget it.
I had been working very hard to refocus on myself not other people for assumptions can go to the rooftop and it will drain me. So, I have been learning to shift my mind to start recognizing and appreciating my strengths by showing compassion to myself. So here below are steps that I have learned to take for myself that has improved my self-esteem which is guiding me to create the world I once imagined.
Step 1: Accept that I am not perfect and search for my good qualities and start appreciating them.
Step 2: Practice self-forgiveness and accept imperfections and allow your being within to be gentler, kind, and understanding with all the little pieces that make you be you. So, by doing that I have learned to not punish myself for any mistakes I have done and weaknesses I possess. With that mindset, I am learning to find peace with who I am.
Step 3: Practice Self Gratitude is something I even forget to do. Though I always try to keep a list of gratification about all my outer world blessings such as family and friends. It is easy to sweep under the table how we should also appreciate ourselves and who and what we are. We must also see ourselves how our loved ones see us, and it's then that we learn to accept ourselves and live life unapologetically by being authentic.
Step 4: Do not set limits on seeds you can feed your mind. Mindset is so powerful tool and if you continue to focus on positivism, it will increase your happiness and lead you to a level of success. Just don't go through life but grow through life by facing situations whether personal or informal. Stay focused on what you can learn from it and find meaning and purpose. Explore the possibilities of ideas and passions to indulge in, that is how you will know what is that you want to do. When you experiment you can take pieces of them and create your very own world, discovering what you are good at and how you can utilize it for your own benefit whether it is for pleasure or professional purposes can be such a profound part of your life that gives meaning.
Step 5: We all have weaknesses so instead of pushing them to the side, view them as an opportunity. First, accept yours, guess what WE ALL HAVE them. So instead of dwelling on them, acknowledge them and work on them so you may get better and/or not let them affect your growth. In life there is a game of give and take and that is another part of the key of the universe, called balance.
Last but most important step: Remember you alone are good enough, the way you naturally think, feel and behave are all parts who you are and gives you the power to utilize your strengths and minimize or manage your weaknesses. Understand this...
“No one is you and that is your superpower"
-Elyse Santilli
oxoxox,
Mizz J.
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